316 | Navigating Our Postpartum Journey

[00:00:06] Welcome to The Optimal Body Podcast. I'm Dr. Jen. And I'm Dr. Dom, and we are doctors of physical therapy, bringing you the body tips and physical therapy pearls of wisdom to help you begin to understand your body, relieve your pains

[00:00:17] and restrictions, and answer your questions. Along with expert guests, our goal of The Optimal Body Podcast is really to help you discover what optimal means within your own body. Let's dive in. Thanks for coming and listening to our postpartum journey. We

[00:00:32] really appreciate you guys witnessing this new chapter in our life and being a part of our community. And I just want to say before we get into how it's been, we have a pelvic floor

[00:00:43] foundations course that is finally here. It launches today. So that means we are in early bird pricing. Plus for being a part of our community, we're giving you an extra discount. If you use code optimal at checkout, you get an extra discount on the early bird price that

[00:01:00] already is. Now I created this course because I've been asked a million and one times when I'm going to come out with something about pelvic floor. So I decided to create an educational

[00:01:10] course that's going to take you through 15 days. It only takes you eight to 15 minutes max to really understand how to start understanding this pelvic floor, what it does within your body, and then how

[00:01:21] to use it functionally through your life. So this is what's most important. And I want you to get is how the pelvic floor integrates into our body and into movement. That is why I created this

[00:01:31] course. So it's 15 days. You get a workbook, you get educational resources on a daily basis. You have an automated calendar that kind of checks your progress. You have support and daily accountability. We have a private call with a doctor of physical therapy and for signing up,

[00:01:49] you have the opportunity to win prizes. And the bonus here, first time we've ever done this, is that you have lifetime access to this course. So you have the opportunity to not just come in

[00:01:59] and learn for these two weeks, but have this as a resource to continue to come back to and understand how to integrate this into your life. I'm so excited for this course. I think it's going

[00:02:08] to be so helpful. So I really hope you take advantage. Go get, the link is down in our show notes. It is Jen.Health.com pelvic floor. Again, use code optimal at checkout, and you're going to

[00:02:20] get that extra discount on top of that early bird pricing that is only for this week only. So excited for today's PT Pearl, because it's going to be a little more of a personal

[00:02:31] story that we think is lined with tons of great valuable takeaways, especially for people out there who might be considering becoming parents or have also just recently become parents. But we're talking about the postpartum journey, navigating that, getting back into movement

[00:02:47] and exercise, but also the recovery after delivery. And also as the partner, the husband, how it has impacted me in learning how to exercise and move and just get through the day. Well, and support your partner. I think that's what's most important as the partners. How do

[00:03:05] you show up in support? And what does that really look like? And some areas where people might forget what is where that partner is most needed or how to show up in the best way.

[00:03:19] So I'm excited to dive into all of that, especially like I feel so much more connected, I would say online, especially in my DMs and things, having gone through and going through currently this postpartum journey. And really all... Everyone who's supporting each other,

[00:03:40] especially those who are supporting me, I'm very appreciative. And we want to start with the early postpartum phase. And I just think that in general, this stuff is so important to talk about and talk through,

[00:03:53] especially before going through delivery and pregnancy, because after the fact you have a whole other aspect, a whole another thing in life that you need to be paying attention to. So you

[00:04:04] don't have a lot of time to figure it out on the fly. And sometimes you feel like the day's just run by. And for how prepared we felt going into it, there definitely still was things after the fact that we needed to really talk through.

[00:04:19] Just want to take a quick pause from chatting about our postpartum journey to ask you a quick question. Are you somebody who has issues with your feet, your ankles? Are you toes? Do you have heel pain, arch pain? Have you been told you need to wear

[00:04:32] inserts or use orthotics? If you've listened to Jen and I chat before, you know that we are huge, huge believers in barefoot training and that our feet have the components they need to support

[00:04:45] themselves, to gain that mobility through our arch and through our toes, along with the strength and support that the arch needs so that we don't need things like orthotics or inserts. That's why Jen

[00:04:56] and I wear Vivo barefoot shoes because the shoes themselves help us gain mobility and strength in our feet. There's actually been a research done that shows wearing Vivo barefoot shoes for just

[00:05:06] six months can increase your foot strength up to 70% and we wear them for everything. We wear them for walks outside, slippers inside, hikes, there's even water shoes. We wear them at dances and let

[00:05:18] me tell you, dancing at a wedding in Vivo barefoot shoes is infinitely more comfortable than dancing in dress shoes. So if you want to live that barefoot life in style, choose Vivo barefoot,

[00:05:29] go down to the link in the show notes and make sure you use code TOB at checkout for 15%. You'll be doing the barefoot life in style and your foot and your body will thank you.

[00:05:42] I mean, being first and foremost that I didn't expect to have a cesarean or that wasn't my intentional plan going into birth. Yeah, it wasn't the plan A. Yeah, it was something that we knew

[00:05:55] could happen but it wasn't something I anticipated really wanting going into birth. So all of a sudden coming out from a major abdominal surgery where they cut through seven layers of tissue and then going home and experiencing what that healing process would have to be, you know,

[00:06:13] that was a new thing. So talk through a little bit what, again, what you were maybe anticipating the rehab or recovery to be like, especially since you had a different plan, home birth, uh, you know, without any sort of major interventions or surgery for that matter.

[00:06:32] And then what you started to do for recovery and how you navigated that kind of having the unexpected C-section. Well, first of all, I will say, you know, having taken a course and I talked

[00:06:45] about this in our birth story, um, taking a course on all aspects of birth and learning about cesarean even if I didn't want to watch that section because, oh, it's not going to be me. Yeah,

[00:06:58] that's not going to happen. I'm preparing my body. Um, so even, you know, having watched all of that, there was still this aspect of, of okay, like, are there going to be things that I don't expect

[00:07:10] when I'm getting home? So I actually had reached out to my cousin who had a cesarean for medical reasons. Um, and she was helpful in just of what to remember, like this is a major abdominal

[00:07:23] surgery. So treat it as such you might feel okay, especially in the very beginning, you get a nerve block. So you don't really feel much, right? You feel like you can move around a little bit more,

[00:07:32] but you know, it's that, it's that reminder that this is a major abdominal surgery. So go into home feeling like you're taking care of a huge, you know, surgery and getting the support that

[00:07:46] you need. Like she even said, you know, you might need help getting into bed and even just sitting up on the bed and laying back down, you know, and so really paying attention to those

[00:07:56] things was, was important. And I will say also making sure that yes, as much as we need rest, that doesn't mean that we don't need to move because fluids really build up in the legs,

[00:08:08] especially after you've had all of the medicine in your body and, you know, numbing stuff. So we really need to keep up with our mobility as best as possible. So something that I committed

[00:08:20] to doing early from the moment that I had the surgery was getting out of bed and just marching at least next to the bed and moving my legs, you know? Yeah. And I think that's so important because our lymphatic system is kind of what we're trying

[00:08:34] to target here. And if we are recovering from surgery, again, we do need to rest. Rest is definitely a component, but as we're resting, one of the primary drivers of that lymphatic system is the muscle pump. And if you're not using those big muscles in your legs

[00:08:49] and in your hips or breathing well, we're not helping to promote good lymphatic flow. So I think that's a great pointer. Yeah. And, and I'm very appreciative that I love our room

[00:09:02] set up and how we already had that at going home. So being in my bedroom, I felt very supported that, you know, I'd have the sunlight from opening the curtains and I can just move around my room. I have

[00:09:13] everything. We really set it up so we had everything we needed in that room and I didn't need to go up and downstairs. And I think that's what was really important too,

[00:09:22] was if I was going to go up and downstairs, I was only going to do it once a day because honestly, the soreness from just lifting the legs and whenever we bring up our leg, we're using our core.

[00:09:35] So it's not just your hip flexor, it's your entire core complex working together. And that was just very delicate in the very beginning and something that I didn't have access to. And sometimes not something you might feel immediately while you're doing the stairs,

[00:09:49] you know, it might be a bit tender or sore, but you said there was a couple of days that you went up and down maybe two or three times and you're like, oh my gosh, I didn't think I'd be this

[00:09:59] sore from going up and down the stairs that many times. And again, we're talking in the first days after this abdominal surgery. I think the hospital said they would allow you to stay four nights

[00:10:10] after C-section, but we kind of wanted to get home and be in our own space. So we were home after two. And so you're three days out of this major surgery and needing to now navigate home.

[00:10:24] And that's where Dom kind of joked that he needed, I needed a little bell because that's essentially what it was. The little Butler's bell to... Instead I would just call him, can you bring up some water? I need a refill on that.

[00:10:38] So really I should have just changed my ringtone to the sound of a bell and then I would know. But yeah, that was one of my early kind of pivots was needing to be okay. And I was very okay just

[00:10:52] being the caretaker, you know, in a way and doing whatever you needed. And I think that there was a day, one of our first days back where all you wanted to do was take your big body pillow and

[00:11:02] move it to the other side of you. And I looked over and you're like crying because you're like, I can't even move my pillow. Yeah. It was just this feeling of defeat of like, wow, I'm so helpless in this moment

[00:11:16] and not look... And that was my view, right? I shouldn't have looked at it as in I'm helpless. I just had it again, a major adrenal surgery, so I need support. And that's not something that's helpless. That's something that's necessary in the moment. But for me to realize,

[00:11:30] oh my gosh, I can't even twist from my abdominal region to lift this big body pillow up and around me. Like I have to ask my husband to help me with that. I already had to ask you to help with getting the baby up every night.

[00:11:43] Yeah. I mean, especially since whenever he's waking up, we're trying to breastfeed to get him to gain weight early on. And so, you know, every time he would wake up, I would get up,

[00:11:53] get him to you to breastfeed, you'd hand him to me to burp, put him back down. Yeah. And that was kind of the cycle early on. Yeah. He got him up, did the diaper changes even every single time and really just handed

[00:12:06] him off to me so that I could breastfeed. And that was so incredibly supportive. Like I can't imagine not having that support because you're up every two to three hours. So not having that support throughout the night. Yes, we're both left with not getting

[00:12:21] great sleep. But honestly, at least for me, like Dom had to do a lot in terms of he was doing the cooking, he was doing the cleaning. He's the one running up and down the stairs, taking meetings for work because I wasn't as present on those.

[00:12:39] But what I had in the very beginning is you have a very sleepy newborn. So yes, it's a lot, right? I was grateful and lucky enough to be able to breastfeed right away. I had a lactation

[00:12:51] consultant that I had lined up prior to birth. So we had her support as well and understanding what I'm doing and making sure everything is going well. And so after I would feed him and

[00:13:03] he would go down, sometimes I could take a nap, you know? And so there's still this getting sleep, getting a little bit of recovery. I'm not moving around doing too much. I was even able to

[00:13:13] record posts within those first early weeks, which I didn't think that I was going to be able to do. Which again, I want to talk about some of those posts because like what were some of the,

[00:13:23] you know, you talked about getting up and marching at the bedside to make sure fluids were still moving. But again, abdominal surgery, everyone talks so much about pelvic floor and starting to kind of reassociate yourself and become aware of your pelvic floor and what that's doing. So

[00:13:38] what were some of the initial exercises in even that first week or two that you started doing? Yes. Well, first of all, I did create like a little, you know, C-section guide for those

[00:13:49] early weeks that you can... We'll have a link in the show notes and you can just click into that link into your email and it'll get sent to your inbox of just kind of like a download of what

[00:14:00] exercises to do, what I recommend, when scar tissue mobilization starts, what that looks like, all of it. So it's all there. It's all for free. But you know, what was most important is something

[00:14:11] I started day one in the hospital was just gentle diaphragmatic breathing. So meaning that I'm expanding from my rib cage and relaxing and my belly region to it feels comfortable in order

[00:14:22] to get as big of an inhale and as big of an exhale as I feel comfortable with because an exhale is going to cause contraction around the core and tissue as well. So I was just, you know, slowly

[00:14:34] implementing diaphragmatic breathing, expanding and really focusing on that was most important in those first couple weeks, like couple weeks. And then understanding, okay, can I start to move my pelvis with some of this breathing and do a little bit of gentle rocks? Can I start to move

[00:14:52] my knees side to side and get a little bit of stretching in the tissue? And then even just starting to stand and extend a little bit. So I would go into a little squat as to what felt

[00:15:04] comfortable. And I would kind of do this at the edge of my dresser and then press my hands down and extend to a just to standing. I mean, at first it wasn't like I was bending backwards or anything.

[00:15:16] I was just going into a full stand so that I'm getting that initial mobilization around that scar and through my tissue. And I think that's what was so supportive in order to start to navigate me back into more movement. Because everyone thinks about scar mobilization,

[00:15:32] especially when we're talking about C-section of like massaging directly on the scar, which again isn't something that you're going to do until a little bit later. But with wound healing, especially after that first six to eight day period, it's super important,

[00:15:47] like you're saying, to start activating the muscles in the area, getting the muscles to start to expand and contract, especially those layers of muscles that they had to cut through so that we can promote good, proper healing of those muscle tissues,

[00:16:01] those fibers, all the fascial layers around it. And that can be just as important, I would say, if not more important to the incision healing and getting good mobile tissue in that area than doing direct scar mobilization later on. Yeah. And I would say there's also no

[00:16:20] immediate rush to the scar mobilization, like directly with your hands. I think that's talked about so much, but know that we're going to continue to heal this scar for years and then

[00:16:31] maybe even continue to touch it years after that. And it's never too late to begin scar mobilization, even if you never did it. Like you can still touch into your tissue and start to create more mobility

[00:16:45] in the area. So it's never too late and you don't have to go too soon because you really want to pay attention to that soreness. Like I, again, breastfeeding and burping, I had little feet

[00:16:57] kicking me pretty early on, right? Already starting my scar mobilization or even just laying in bed, side-lying with him and feeling those little kicks. So I was very aware of like, okay, too soon.

[00:17:10] Too soon to be touching this area, too soon to be really mobilizing. So focusing again on that breath and the active mobility of my entire body and then starting with touch mobilization

[00:17:25] around where my rib cage is or around my entire belly up higher of my scar and kind of feeling and mobilizing around that area was really important. And I wouldn't start to get closer

[00:17:38] to the scar until like four to six weeks. So I wasn't even touching the scar yet, but I'm still just going around moving my stomach tissue up and away from the scar, making little circles around

[00:17:51] the area. And then if you want to help desensitize the scars while laying on your stomach early on, starting to touch and move around that scar and then using like a light touch, so like a light

[00:18:06] towel across the scar, I would kind of do that after I showered and dried off. Which is honestly more sensory stuff than it is mobilization of actual tissues because when we deal with the nerves or cutting nerves, gaining back that sensation is also super important. Very important.

[00:18:22] So I also want to talk about how people can set up their environment or like, again, managing expectations, managing expectations with people coming to visit, setting up the communication so that you have strong communication between you and your partner.

[00:18:38] And you've talked a little bit about setting up the environment in general for success. So what are some things that people should be aware of? Let's talk visitors. Yeah. I, you know, early on and we have family in Minnesota from your family.

[00:18:54] So knowing like, well, how early should they book and come out? And I honestly had no idea how it was going to feel after I delivered. So I really couldn't put a timeline on that until I

[00:19:09] felt, until I delivered and felt like, oh, it's okay. Like I would love to have support and people around and, you know, immediate family members who I know are just going to be more

[00:19:19] supportive than we're having to take care of them. Like I would love them to come sooner than later. And that's what I kind of realized in the beginning, but I needed to kind of,

[00:19:28] and I think it's such an individual journey. Like you have to almost have birth and see who you are in that new stage to know what you need and how you can be supported. Like really

[00:19:41] my mom and my sister were the only ones coming over in the very beginning because they knew that they would bring things that we needed and only be there for a limited

[00:19:50] time. They would be in my room so I wouldn't have to go up and down the stairs and they didn't care, you know, if the ladies were out. Yeah. If you're needing to breastfeed. And I think,

[00:20:00] so again, I think understanding how you and your partner manage having people over or needing to entertain, understanding the people who might be coming over. Do they completely understand that they're coming there to support you rather than coming there to even to see the baby or

[00:20:21] do you like what's the focus of the visit? Is it to support the parents? Do they feel like they're going to come over and be entertained or be hosted? Luckily, the majority, if not all the people that

[00:20:33] we had over early on were very supportive and helped out around the house, did the dishes, did the trash. One of my pointers, if you're going to visit new parents and this can especially be

[00:20:45] important if you haven't had a kid yourself. Yes. Like try to go there and do something that's going to take something off of their plate, off of the new parent's plate. If there's a dish full,

[00:20:55] if a sink is full of dishes, if you see a trash overflowing, take it out, change the trash, you know, do the dishes, do something that they can look up and say, oh no, no, you don't need

[00:21:06] to do that. But in reality, they're just like, thank God I don't need to do those dishes later. That is a great way to get invited back to be able to see the kid again versus if you come over,

[00:21:20] even if you like make a meal but then leave a bunch of dishes in the dishwasher or leave the kitchen somewhat a mess, that can be a huge problem or inconvenience for those parents

[00:21:31] after you leave. Like, okay, now one of us needs to clean the kitchen when in reality there's a lot of other things they might have wanted to do. So, especially as new parents and

[00:21:40] in those first three months, like you might think, oh, it's, you know, they're already in it for a couple months. They've got the, no, things are changing every day. You might think that you got

[00:21:48] sleep down and then the next day you're like, what happened to this child? So, you know, I would say as people who don't have kids, just be mindful of one, are you going over to someone that you feel

[00:22:01] comfortable enough to do all those things? Because if you don't feel comfortable to like just dive in and get into their sink and get into all these things and their laundry, then maybe giving

[00:22:10] them a little more space and time or just dropping off a meal and not spending any time inside. Oh, we had some great friends who multiple times just like dropped stuff off at our door and said,

[00:22:20] hey, there's a package at your door, like dropped off groceries, dropped off, you know, some other things that they picked up for us. And that's just amazing. It's just like, oh my gosh. So supportive. But if you, you know, just being aware of the surroundings, we had

[00:22:34] people early on who again, no kids were came over and there were, you know, I would say things that we needed to clean in the kitchen. And that was, I think two weeks in, that was the time that I

[00:22:47] was going up and down stairs the most because I was leaving to breastfeed because we had some other company over that I didn't know if I felt comfortable enough doing that in front of.

[00:22:57] So I was going up and down the stairs and that I was super sore after. And then I would say a couple weeks after that. So still very early on within that first month, you know, that's when we had our

[00:23:08] first like wild night. Yeah. And we were going to try to have a game night with some friends, you know, a couple couples that are two of our closest, you know, couple friends came over,

[00:23:20] we did dinner, had a game night and that was all great. You know, that was all fine. But then when it was time to put Dante down to sleep. He lost his mind. He just lost his mind. And we've never experienced this yet.

[00:23:31] Way overstimulated. Yeah, we hadn't experienced that going down to bed for his first, you know, long stretch, which at that time weren't that long. And again, so me being the Minnesotan people pleaser, like Jen went upstairs and pretty quickly was just like,

[00:23:50] I just need to be up here with him. I can't come back down. Well, I will just say like he started crying, losing his mind. So I started crying and losing

[00:23:57] my mind. This is like, I'm like, why can't I sue them? He doesn't want to eat. He doesn't want to be held like he'd like nothing is working. You know, so yeah, first time mom, I'm crying.

[00:24:10] And so I was like running up the stairs saying like, can I do anything? Can I help? Then I would run back down and they were like still sitting there with the game out on the table,

[00:24:17] like ready to play. And I'm like, I don't think Jen and I are going to be able to play the game. You know, I'm again, the people pleaser who's not just going to run down and be like, hey,

[00:24:26] you guys got to leave. Like we need to go to bed, which probably would have been the best thing for me to say. And they would have totally understood. But again, I ended up going up and down the stairs

[00:24:36] three or four times and just saying like, do whatever you want. We just need to deal with our baby. And eventually they're just like, okay, we can just take off. Well, it wasn't until you started turning off some lights.

[00:24:50] Yeah. It had gotten dark outside and there were still lights on over in the other room. And so I started turning off those lights and my good friend Ben is just like, I think Dom's about to

[00:24:59] turn the lights off on us. So I think that's our cue to leave. And again, they were lighthearted about it and they didn't care that we were not there with them. They were just chatting with each

[00:25:10] other. But again, it's understanding those boundaries with friends. And I think that's the point of this. Well, and with your partner, because I think I kept asking you every time you came out, are they leaving yet? Are they leaving yet? Are they gone? Because what I needed

[00:25:25] in that moment was your presence and support. To be there in the room rather than running up and down trying to... I don't know. I don't know what I was trying to do. And in my head, I'm like,

[00:25:36] they can hear a baby screaming, right? So they're going to leave. Like why would they stay? We obviously can't do a game night. But that wasn't what... And I get people who don't know. This is

[00:25:47] our first time. We're not experienced with it. And they're both planning weddings. They're just sitting there chatting their wedding. And I was the one telling them just like, hey, just hang out, whatever. Like no rush. And it gives me anxiety to even think about just going down the

[00:26:03] stairs and saying like, hey, can you guys just leave? We got to deal with Dante because I don't know. That's hard for me to do. But now he knows what his wife needs. For sure. In that moment and

[00:26:16] next time around or I mean, her baby's still only... When we're recording this, five months old. And so, I mean, I'm sure there's going to be a night like that again. Yeah, exactly. And so really just

[00:26:28] that excessive communication prior. Like if this situation comes up, what do you feel most comfortable with? Like how would best support me? I think that is a really good way to enter in that

[00:26:40] conversation. If this situation happens, what would best support you and what would you need in that moment? Because just having all those scenarios kind of like communicated on is really what's most important. And then in terms of getting back into movement exercise, I think people can look

[00:27:00] at my journey and say, oh my gosh, you're already doing HIIT workouts. You were doing pull-ups three months postpartum, like all this kind of stuff. But you have to realize that I believe that

[00:27:11] rehab, you know, afterwards starts with what you do prehab. And for me in pregnancy, that means that I was able to work out all the pregnancy. Now I'm very aware that that is not always the case for a

[00:27:25] lot of people. And it does make that postpartum journey a little bit tougher. I was grateful that I had no high risk, you know, thing that I need to worry about for pregnancy. So I was able to

[00:27:37] work out, lift heavy and do what I was normally doing prior to pregnancy as well, which kept my body really healthy and fit to be able to get back to movement and take care of my baby. I mean,

[00:27:48] being a mom is a lot. You're going up and down. You're getting your baby from the floor and having to lunge and stand up like there's a lot of pressure on your body. And so that's where you

[00:27:58] can get into back pain, knee pain, neck pain, all these different pains around the body. If you don't know how to properly support the body going into postpartum. Yeah. And I mean, I think we say that

[00:28:10] in when we talk about any type of injury, like the better off and the more you have prehabbed that area or the stronger and more mobile that area is prior to injury or prior to surgery, the easier

[00:28:21] it's going to be to rehab. And I mean, you started moving around that six week mark, but it was also a progression. You know, yes, you did some strength workouts, but you did a lot of them just body

[00:28:32] weight. You did a lot of them with very minimal weight to get your body used to that movement, used to that load again before you started increasing and progressing to where you are now.

[00:28:42] Well, and that's what's most important is thinking of that entire core complex. Like even though I had a cesarean birth, I'm still looking at my entire core complex, which is from my diaphragm

[00:28:53] to my pelvic floor. Like we have to realize if you made it all the way through pregnancy to the very end, you were putting a lot of extra load and pressure down onto your pelvic floor. And so no

[00:29:05] matter what kind of birth you had, your pelvic floor can be compromised in terms of, you know, still experiencing leaking, especially with a scar that is so low to your pelvic floor muscles, like that can impact what's happening at the pelvic floor. And so understanding this feedback

[00:29:22] of like, when is it too tight? Is it too weak with my entire body? Is it not coordinated with my breath and movement? Like all of these things really take a place. And that's why I started

[00:29:34] these early movements, you know, in week one to week four of really what am I doing to start to address all of this. And, you know, we are excited to have our pelvic floor foundations course,

[00:29:48] which kind of helps to highlight, especially in that first week, like say you're not ready for that second week of really going over a lot of the exercises. That first week is going to give

[00:29:57] you an introduction into what is the pelvic floor? What am I looking at? What am I feeling? How is it coordinated with my breath, with my posture? What am I looking at within my entire body that could

[00:30:09] be leading to tension? Like we go over so much within that first like eight days that really help to bring in that foundation of how your pelvic floor interacts with your entire system.

[00:30:22] And then I think it's so great what we do on kind of the back half of that program. You show how you take that awareness, that coordination, that mobility, then integrates or translates into exercises in really every position in laying on your back,

[00:30:38] laying on your stomach, seated, standing, jumping all the way through. And I think that's what you were very aware of when you started exercises again. You had kind of started to rebuild some of that awareness and consciousness of your pelvic floor and then integrated that into those more

[00:30:56] strength or higher level or even jumping type activities. And so, yeah, pelvic floor foundations just went out today. If you're listening to this when it's launching, you can get in at the early

[00:31:08] bird price. And also for our podcast listeners, I think we should do a little discount. So, get an extra $5 off if you use code optimal to get that course and you can get that at any time. So,

[00:31:21] check out the link in the show notes. We'll have the pelvic floor foundations linked up down there and you can get a discount on it with code optimal. Well, I just want to say too, I think

[00:31:30] the way that it was shown in my first early videos of getting back into movement at three months postpartum, I think it was right before three months postpartum technically as well.

[00:31:42] I was doing leg lifts, which I was surprised I couldn't do. This is toe to bar. So, think without the momentum, I'm just hanging on a bar and I'm lifting my legs up to the bar, which

[00:31:53] previous to pregnancy was no problem to me. I could whip them out with single arm like, you know, whatever. And now, and then when I tried it, I could barely lift my legs above

[00:32:04] horizontal, which shocked me. However, what I really looked at and what I noticed is that I had no signs of coning or doming within my abdomen. I had, when I got back to jumping and

[00:32:16] hit workouts, I had no signs of leaking or increased pressure in my pelvic floor. And yes, this is my first child. So, things change after, you know, one, I'm going to acknowledge

[00:32:26] that this is my first one, but I'm also going to acknowledge that the work that I've done previously and the work that I did afterwards to connect and understand this pelvic floor complex

[00:32:36] with my entire core really is what supported me in being able to do these movements without any signs and symptoms. Yeah. And I think that's huge. And I don't think that there's any question

[00:32:47] that the work you did beforehand or now has impacted the minimal amounts of symptoms you've had pelvic floor or core related. And I think we kind of just want to wrap up this episode by talking a little bit about the mental emotional aspect of moving into parenthood,

[00:33:06] what that means, almost grieving in a way, like the quote old life you used to have or what the old normal used to be like. How do you feel like you've had to cope or do you feel like you've had

[00:33:20] to cope at all with how things in life have changed? I want to be so delicate with this because postpartum depression and anxiety is so real, right? For so many people. I will say I'm very

[00:33:37] grateful that I haven't experienced it to a level that I think some people do. I would say my depressive type symptoms might come on if I know that repetitively I've gone through cycles of not

[00:33:53] getting good sleep, of being super tired, of being work pressured on top of it, of seeing someone else take care of my son as I'm trying to work and feeling guilty. Not guilty, not even

[00:34:08] guilty, but just feeling sad that like, wait, this is such his early stages. I want to be soaking up the time with him. I don't want someone else to be... Which funny story, Jen's mom, she was coming over to help watch Jen occasionally. Watch Dante, not me.

[00:34:26] Watch Jen. Watch Dante. Help Jen, watch Dante so that we could get a little bit more work done. I mean, this was like two to three months. Start getting back into work. Yeah, and this is already two to three months in.

[00:34:37] I feel like I came downstairs and then Jen was playing with Dante. Her mom was nowhere to be seen. I'm like, where'd your mom go? And she's like, oh, I sent her home. I was sad watching her play with Dante. So I needed to be with him.

[00:34:52] Yeah, I literally was like crying and I was like, no, you can leave now. Yeah, you can go home. Your time is done. Which we're very grateful to have that support from my mom. Yeah. And I think... So close to us.

[00:35:06] Just needing to be honest too about, we both work from home. Yeah. You know, we run Jen's business, we run our own business. So we have the flexibility to,

[00:35:15] we tried setting things up. So we had a lot of time that we could take off or be working minimally. Our team that works for us knew that, okay, we're new parents, we're going to be a little

[00:35:27] more detached during this stage. And not everybody has that. And so, also being very clear and honest that our early parenthood journey looks a lot different than most other people. Because some

[00:35:39] people might have to be working right away or their partner might have to be working right away or might only get a limited time to take off to be there in home in that early parenthood stage.

[00:35:49] So we're very grateful for that. And also on top of that, I mean, speaking a little bit to my new normal and grieving of what things used to look like, it changes everything.

[00:36:01] We're grateful for being home. And also we work from home. So anytime our little guy's here, it's challenging to be able to get uninterrupted work time. Because even if I'm supposed to have a work block when Jen's doing something with him, there might be something,

[00:36:17] oh, can you quick make me something to eat? Oh, can you quick do this or that? So again, having that communication and setting up with your partner, what that looks like, what work now looks like for us both working from home. Exercise for me,

[00:36:31] I'm still figuring it out. I don't feel like I exercise nearly as much as I used to or as much as I should be doing for my body. I tell myself every day, I'm going to get up early and

[00:36:43] do a little bit of movement, go on a run with the dog just to get something in before baby wakes up. Most days right now I'm failing at that, but I'm trying to, again, have grace for myself.

[00:36:54] We're less than half a year into parenthood. So everything. And I think one of the main things also, and I have a friend who's talked with me about this. He's like, how have things changed

[00:37:07] between you and Jen? How have things changed in your partnership? Because we might want to have kids, but I'm afraid it's going to rock the boat. And I'm like, well, it definitely rocks the

[00:37:18] boat. It's just a matter of how you ride the wave. And it's just a matter of how you direct that energy because all those things have changed drastically in all aspects of life. I think that

[00:37:32] for the most part, it's for the better. And it's because what we've talked about throughout the podcast today is make sure that communication's there. Make sure you're communicating and over-communicating everything because especially when you're underslept,

[00:37:46] especially when you don't feel like you're getting the movement or the self-care things in that you normally did for yourself, making sure that open line of communication is there is so important

[00:37:57] because the hair trigger is just a little bit more touchy to get, I don't want to say angry, but to get angry or upset about something. Frustrated. Frustrated with how something might be going during the day. And so again, being able to

[00:38:13] take that pause and tell yourself, I'm doing my best. Wife's doing her best. Let's work through this together. Super important. And I think the thing that's really set up our relationship and something we've talked

[00:38:28] about on the podcast before is setting up couple goals. And so, we've not been consistent with it, this postpartum phase. However... I think our May goals are still on the board. Yes. It's like the end of June right now recording this.

[00:38:44] But I think what... It's still something that we're conscious of in our minds to be able to write down, to be able to see, to be able to at least work toward. No, we're not going to be

[00:38:54] perfect at it right now. Of course not. But setting up that intention of how are we... Have we been spending intimate time together, just the two of us really connecting? What does

[00:39:06] that look like? What have we been doing? And have we taken that space and time? I think that's been something that we're conscious and aware of and something we're putting down. What am I doing for

[00:39:17] myself? What am I doing for my body? How am I supporting us in our workspace? So, we have been writing down those goals, which we've talked about in another podcast about what that looks like. So, you can go to that podcast.

[00:39:31] It's usually like our New Year's podcast when we talk about setting goals and... Yeah. And it's still been something that is so supportive to us and something that we've been

[00:39:41] trying to do the best that we can. And I will just say that I'm just so grateful to be a mom. It's something that I've always wanted and something that I had really looked forward to

[00:39:57] in my life. And I think being so clear and so certain that that is something that I've wanted in my life has allowed me to not feel so much. I mean, potential symptoms of postpartum depression.

[00:40:15] I know that can still happen for those who want babies. But for me, I feel like I'm just so excited to soak in all the newness, all the stages, all the craziness that comes along with it

[00:40:27] that I just feel so grateful every day. Every day that I'm looking at him, every day that I get to play with him, no matter how hard it is in work or in our relationship. It's something that I've

[00:40:37] wanted for so long and having lost our first bub. I'm just so grateful to have him here and to be able to experience that. So, just for me, I just am overjoyed and continuing to see how I can

[00:40:57] still maintain my relationships with my friends and what that looks like in a new capacity, especially with those who don't have children or don't want to have children. And getting even

[00:41:11] closer to my friends who have children and reaching out to them for support and what that looks like and how we're supporting our journeys. It's all been fun. And I'm very grateful to have

[00:41:23] such a supportive partner because I think that is something that a lot of people don't have as well. So, knowing that I had a partner who was willing to wake up in the middle of the night with me

[00:41:34] multiple times and support my journey, support my body healing and especially support me in saying, I need to work out today. This is gonna not only physically, but this is for my mental health. I

[00:41:48] have to get my workout in today. And he's like, okay, great. I'll do a contact nap with Dante or I'll hang out with Dante. Go get your workout in. It's not even a question or a fight back.

[00:41:58] And the fact that you allow me to take care of me as well is just, I think that's part of why I feel so supported in this journey. Well, thanks, babe. I second all of that.

[00:42:13] Thanks so much for spending some time and listening to us. We just really appreciate this community. It feels so supportive. And of course, pass this episode along with others who are either in it, gonna be in it or struggling as well. We wanna be able to support everyone

[00:42:33] within their movement, within their body and their mental health journey, especially postpartum. And of course, if you are looking for pelvic floor understanding and getting back into your core foundations, we really recommend joining the pelvic floor foundations course. It is currently

[00:42:50] going on. We have that discount for you. Use code optimal and check out that link in the show notes.